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Penguinisto - Subject: "You know what DiDio? I LIKE you!..." ( Aug 26, 2003, 14:35:19 )
SCO sometimes reminds me of a certain song... many of you may already know it. For those that don't... (shamelessly ripped off from The Dead Milkmen's "Stuart", from the album "Beelzebubba". Actual lyrics can be had here: http://www.plyrics.com/lyrics/deadmilkmen/stuart.h tml ) -- You know what, Laura DiDio? I LIKE YOU! You're not like the other people, here, in the Lindon trailer park! Oh, nonono, don't go get me wrong. They're fine people, they're good Americans. But they're content to sit back, fire up their Windows XP boxes and surf a little Internet on AOL, maybe chat a little on MSN. They're good, fine people, Stuart. But they don't know ... what the penguins are doing to our code! [...] You know that Johnny Werzner kid - the kid who ports apps in the neighborhood? He's a fine kid. Some of the neighbors say he smokes crack, but I don't believe it. Anyway, for his 10th birthday, all he wanted was a Sourceforge page. "Dad, get me a Sourceforge account. I'll never ask for anything else as long as I live". So the guy breaks down and set him up with a Sourceforge page. Anyway, 10:30, the other night, I go over next door, and there's the Werzner kid, looking up something on the 'net. I say, "What are you looking for?" He says "I'm looking for the source code to this new app." I say, "Jumping Jesus on a Pogo Stick! Everybody knows the source code is proprietary! Under NDA! In a vault! Why the hell do you think they call it 'source code' anyway!?" Now Laura, do you think a kid like that is going to know what the penguins are doing to the code!? I first became aware of this about ten years ago, the summer my oldest boy, Darl Jr. died. You know that trade show comes into town every year? Well this year IBM came through with a Demo called The Parser. The man said, "Keep your links, and dependencies, inside The Parser at all times!" But not Darl Jr - he was a DAAAREDEVIL, just like his old man! He was banging out code, saying "Hey everybody, Look at me! Look at me!" POW! He was decapitated! They found his head over by the Microsoft .NET concession! A few days after that, I open up the mail - and there's a pamphlet in there - from Pueblo, Colorado ! And it's addressed to Darl Jr. And it's entitled: "Do you know what the penguins are doing to our code!?" Now, Laura! If you look at the soil around any large US city where there's a large underground kernel hacker population. Portland, Oregon - perfect example. Look at the soil around Portland, Stuart... You can't build on it; you can't grow anything in it. The government says it's due to poor farming. But I know what's really going on, Laura. I know it's the penguins! They're in it with the aliens! They're building landing strips for code-stealing Martians! I swear to God! You know what, Laura DiDio? I like you! You're not like the other people, here in the Lindon trailer park...
