"Dear Lina, I love my laptop so I put Linux on it so it would be nice and
fast. Linux feels so _slow_ on it; when I turn it on I want access
right away. Booting up takes for_ever_ and it just goes on and on
babbling about things I don't have - SCSI this, don't need to probe
that. I can finish a whole cup of coffee before it gets going!
Can you help bring me up to speed?..."
I'm not a very nerdy computer person. In fact, I like to hang out
in the park and enjoy a little sun, wind, and shade. Of course, I
have my laptop since I'm always working on my web pages.
I thought I was alone in my aberrant habits until yesterday when I
saw someone else with a laptop. If I keep seeing him there I'm
thinking of going by and saying Hi, maybe I'll offer to trade files
or something, but I realized... there's no way to trade bits out
here. What am I gonna do?"