"If Linux Won't Fork, We'll Make It Fork", Vow Top
"A team of journalists has set out to make Linux incompatible
with itself. Rebuffed throughout the ages by countless failed
predictions of kernel forks, these mavericks have decided to take
the code into their own hands. Called "Windix" for maximum brand
confusion, the pundit-approved kernel will be subtly but
definitively incompatible with the current Linux kernel."
"We're sick of eating crow," said an anonymous industry veteran.
"I've been predicting a Linux fork for the past six years, and my
editor is starting to get suspicious whenever I turn in another
what-if fragmentation scenario. I think he's starting to suspect
that I'm using a Perl script to write them."
"Since all existing programs will have to be recompiled to work
under Windix, a binary distribution sharing the Windix name is
planned, avaliable only for the PowerMac. A text-only,
shell-script-driven install will be the only installation option,
allowing journalists to dust off their "Installation Nightmare
Story" Perl scripts. Neither GNOME, KDE, or X will be included in
the distribution, since "Linux has no GUI, dammit."