"Self-diagnosing your problem and informing me what to do -
$150.00
Having me bail you out when you perform your own repairs I told you
not to do - $300.00
Not telling all of your co-workers about it - $850.00
Explaining that you can't log in to some server because you don't
have an account there - $10
Explaining that you don't have an account on the machine you used
to have an account on because you used it to try to break into the
above server - $500
Forgetting your password after it was tattooed on your index finger
- $25"